Drug and alcohol addiction and abuse. Recognition. Prevention. Treatment
20/20 Parenting. Recognizing and mitigating early vulnerabilities and risk factors.
Chapter 1: What To Do About Conflict
A Three-page Free Preview from our E-Book:
Conquering Conflict: Techniques and Strategies For Resolving Blended Family Conflict
By Emily Bouchard, MSSW, blended and bio family coach, 20/20P Founding Contributor
I wanted to be aware that my time with my step-granddaughter was precious and limited. Yet my anger and irritation increased as our time together decreased. Underlying the irritation was a deep sense of loss and sadness about moving so far away and losing our day to day contact that was so rich and fulfilling!
If your family has to deal with children traveling back and forth between your home and their other parents’ homes, you may have noticed that anger and irritation with each other tend to surface around those times of transition.
How aware are you of the feelings of shame, guilt, loss, abandonment, rejection, and hurt that are right under the surface every time the children in your household leave? If you are not consciously aware of the feelings underneath, then the “masking” emotions of anger, frustration, and irritation end up robbing you of those precious moments when you are together with your children.
What to do with Awareness
With the awareness of the role that anger plays in masking underlying feelings of loss and grief, you can use bouts of anger and irritation to your advantage! As soon as you notice that you or your children are becoming irritated, let that irritation be a reminder to BE DIFFERENT by being present. Use those apparent negative feelings as hints to enjoy the people in front of you and your time together while you have it.
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